Wednesday, August 22, 2012

Teacher Appreciation is not a day, it's an attitude



Ahhhhh It's my favorite time of year. I've always loved Back-to-School time.  I've made more successful changes in my life at this time of year than at all of my New Years combined.  It's such a fresh start.

There's also the fact that I'm a school supply junkie.  I loved setting up my classroom. I loved going to Target and buying 10 spiral notebooks for $1.  I STILL have black marbled composition books that I bought at 15 cents apiece over 8 years ago. This year, I enjoyed checking off each of the items on the teachers’ wish lists so much so that my husband was starting to think about sending me to OCD camp. I just had to get EXACTLY what was on the list. That's one of the ways I show my kids' teachers that I love them.

You may recall a post where I was falling apart because I was the "Bad Mother of the Year" sending my son to the school walk-a-thon without sunscreen or a water bottle when I suddenly saw all of these perfect moms walking with bouquets of balloons and arm loads of Starbucks and wrapped gifts for the teachers because it was Teacher Appreciation Day. I felt like complete crud. I dropped the kids off and pulled out of the parking lot with tears streaming down my face.  

It was then that I snapped out of it and realized that I DID show the teachers appreciation. They knew it and I knew it.

Having been on both sides of the classroom door, I want to share what I think are the 10 best ways to show appreciation to a teacher:

1.      Get your children to school prepared and on time.

2.     Attend Back to School Night and conferences. Unless you attend these informational meetings, you are relying only on your child to communicate what the teacher expects.  That leaves a lot of room for misunderstandings and creates more work for the teacher to play catch up on the things you missed.

3.     Create a calm home life that meets your child's emotional and physical needs so they aren't worried while at school. This may mean making sure there is enough time in your morning scheduled to not be running around stressed out and yelling at everyone (guilty of that myself) or keeping things between you and your ex as amicable as possible so the child isn't at school worried about his mom and dad fighting with each other.

4.     Feed your child real food. You can't deny that what we eat and drink affects our moods and brain function while you are standing there talking to me with your double vanilla latte in your hand. A morning breakfast of Cap'n Cruch is not equal to oatmeal or eggs with fruit. Lunchables are not real food.  Children's motors don't run well on bad fuel.

5.     Respect the teachers and their job. When you do have a problem with a teacher, deal with it constructively by communicating with her before complaining to anyone else about the issue.

6.     Be a reader.  When your children are young, read to them every night. As a tutor, I've seen what a HUGE difference this makes in a child's ability to learn. If the children are older, be a good role model. Unplugged from electronics just a half an hour each day and have reading time.  Let them catch you reading a book. Fiction, non-fiction, a newspaper, any type of quality reading. If you don't love reading, fake it 'til you make it.

7.     Support the rules.  The rules are there for a reason and even if you don't care for some of them it is very important that you support them. The rule that homework is to be turned in on time is like us getting our bills paid on time.  You don't pay your electric bill, the electricity gets turned off. There are dress codes in the working world too. When you don't follow the dress code at work, you get fired.  Learning and practicing these rules now will give your children a much easier life as adults. Later on, they will thank you.

8.     Don't bail the kids out or do their homework for them. Forgetting their homework once a year is one thing but bringing their backpack to the front office every time they leave it at home is enabling them and won't help them in their adult life. Doing their homework for them? It's a much better lesson to let them get an F on something they didn't do and deal with the consequences (take away their phone? TV? Video games?) Plus it’s lying and we don’t want to make liars of our children right?

9.     Believe the teacher. I had NO good reason to call and tell you a child cheated on a test unless the child actually cheated on a test.  There is no motivation for me to make up a lie and cause more problems for myself.  I can spend my time and energy doing one hundred other things, but students will lie if they think it will save their behinds. 

10. Give a compliment. I kept a file in my drawer called "The Happy File" where I kept notes and emails that were positive.  If your child is coming home with work you admire, send a quick email to the teacher letting them know. My Kindergartner had little rhymes her teacher taught her to remember how to write her letters and numbers. I thought that was fabulous so I let the teacher know. You would be surprised by how much harassment teachers have to put up with from parents. Your kind words could be the ones that keep a teacher going on a bad day.

Notice none of the above cost money? Well buying real food does, but that’s kind of our job by law anyway.

As this school year gets rolling, keep these tips on mind.  I rather have parents do the things on this list than spend one day or one week buying me things. But hey, if you want to show appreciation on top of what is listed here, (might I suggest gift cards to office supply stores or Target) go for it! You would surely deserve extra credit!

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