When is putting yourself first the right thing to do?

There seems to be two extremes on this subject. There’s the "Looking Out for Number One" club and the "I'm Supposed to Do Everything for Everyone Else" club.  Neither is healthy.  So as I go into the next rock in my jar, I want to be clear that this is not a license to be completely selfish and use it as an excuse to live life without my spouse or children in mind.  This is actually about doing what is BEST for my spouse and children.

My second rock is my health.

What??? God, then Health BEFORE spouse, children, and family?? Yep. I'll use the flight attendant speech as an illustration.  When you are seated on the plane before take-off and you are hearing the instructions to use your bottom, I mean your seat cushion, as a flotation device, the instructions regarding the oxygen mask has a unique twist to it.  You MUST put on your oxygen mask before helping your children.  I've had flight attendants stand over me and sternly look me in the eye and tell me again, "You MUST put your oxygen mask on BEFORE helping your children." Yes, ma'am.

Why do you think they have to point this out to us?  Aren't we selfish creatures whose basic instinct is to go into self-preservation mode? Not when it comes to our kids.  It has to do with survival of the fittest but once we have children they are the ones we've created to pass on our genetics to future generations so then they are the subject of our protection.  We will go to extremes to preserve our children's lives.  God wired us that way.  You know what I mean, the mother bear instinct that causes us to take on a 250 pound man with a gun who threatens our children.  We don't stop to be logical about it, we just do what it takes to take care of our children not thinking about what may happen to us.

We do the same with the little things in life too only instead of our life being in danger in a flash, we can let ourselves go and slowly harm ourselves over time. We must put on our oxygen mask every day in order to be 100% at our best in order to take care of others.

What do we need to do to be at our best? Eat right, exercise, take "me time" breaks, get enough sleep, and all of those other things we put off because we think we don't have enough time.  We see it as a selfish luxury and something that needs to wait until after we've taken care of everyone else.

What happens when we don't put the oxygen mask on ourselves first before helping others? We pass out.  How useful are we to them at that point? We're not.

The health rock could have a jar of its own.  So many aspects are involved and there is so much sand that can get in the way.  I'll be tackling this topic over the next few days.  In the meantime, I have found myself with 15-30 minutes that I can use to take a walk so I'm going to do that.  It doesn't feel right with dishes to be done and other things on my To-Do list, but I know it's the best thing I can do right now for myself and for my children.

We'll do more rock talk tomorrow.